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A JONI THAT SINGS

Anyone could tell he didn’t belong once he opened his mouth to sing the first line of the song “Kumbaya.” Apart from the unconscious cracks and the battle of staying on the key of C major, Joni was shaking with each breath exhaled. His legs wobbled, his hands waggled, and his eyes spoke the language of fear mixed with doubt. How shocking! He was introduced to the choir as a tenor singer from a sister church called Oasis. Unfortunately, this oasis had its lungs and throat all dried up.   Joni stopped singing from the looks on every face. By a corner, he saw the man playing the drums lift his eyebrows - not in wonder but a mechanism most people adopt to hold back laughter. The woman playing the bass guitar was looking down at nothing. As Joni’s eyes roved around the church, he saw an invisible congregation, all rising from their seats, eyes tight with laughter! The white walls were bloody-looking. Ah! Even the brown wooden cross on the altar resembled a negation. Joni felt the wo...
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WEIRD INTERVIEW



WOULD YOU SELL FOOD AS A GRADUATE JUST TO SURVIVE?


My name is Prisca, a graduate of Biological Sciences with a second class upper division and I want to share my job hunting experience just after I was done with service. 
I was desperately looking for a job so I kept applying and going for every interview I was called for.
 I went for an interview not quite long ago. It was a sales manager position advertised online. I saw this as an opportunity to meet new people and be more outspoken and to network. So I applied; forwarded my CV. Afterwards I got a mail from them saying that out of the 50 people who applied for the job, I was opportune to have been selected. This made me very happy and I didn’t mind borrowing money to go for the interview at Ojota.
When I got to the location I was not sure it was the right address even though I could clearly see the house number.  I asked a lady; just to be convinced, about an interview taking place there and she replied “yes this is the place.”
Ha! To my astonishment this place was occupied by people cooking moi moi (Bean Cake), rice, beans, not in large quantities but is small coolers. This lady I had asked to help confirm the address turned out to be the person who had forwarded the interview email to me. Apparently she was with the HR team. We both went in and I was asked to wait. When she returned, she kept asking me all that was on my Cv and lastly, my pay expectations. I told her I would like to begin with 80,000 since I had no work experience. The next thing, this woman asked me to go out and tell a particular woman to fry plantain. Foolish me went to deliver the message and when I returned, Mrs. HR was introducing me to the environment:
“So Prisca, this is a job where you have to sell food. We cook food and sell at strategic points.”
UN-PACKAGED FOOD! When someone wants to buy you would have to sell with spoon and plate… I was shocked! She kept on preaching on how a cab man would pick me up and I’ll have to sell from Monday till Sunday sometimes; that’s if the food was still remaining. She said I’ll also take along with me a microwave since many people liked their food hot. Plus, I would resume by 8am for those going to work who would love to have their breakfast and close 9pm for those coming back from work and would want to buy food.
I didn’t know when tears began to drop from my eyes. I was already crying and asking God if this was what He wanted to do with my life… Would "mamaput" be my new occupation now or what? Mamaput as a job! Along the line I asked her if she read through my CV and she said yes:
“ I did. You’re Prisca and you graduated from Eboyin State University right? I remember you because my friend is from that state. You even graduated with a second class upper right?”
She knew all these and still sent me a foolish mail!!! It did not end there. This woman said I should resume work that moment: “start packaging, start covering the foods and I’ll call the cab man right away”
This was when I told her that I had to leave but would be back, out of respect for her. She said she knew that I wasn’t going to take the job and that I should just say so. She was really taking it personal so I told her I couldn’t take the job. These were my exact words…
“I can’t take this job.  I cannot be found selling food on the streets. For crying out loud I know my destination. I know it may take time getting there but I know what I want and I know where I want to be. Please ma I’m sorry but I cannot!
A Shared Experience       

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